SACRED REFLECTION - Closing the Year with Wisdom (Not Pressure)

"We do not learn from experience... we learn from reflecting on experience."  

— John Dewey

We're here. The threshold.

Between what was and what will be. Between who you were and who you're becoming. Between the year that's ending and the year that's beginning.

This liminal space—the days between Christmas and New Year—is sacred.

And most of us rush right through it.

We make resolutions we won't keep. We pressure ourselves to be "better." We focus on everything we didn't accomplish instead of who we became.

What if we did something radically different this year?

What if we closed 2025 with wisdom instead of willpower? With reflection instead of resolutions? With kindness instead of criticism?

That's what this final Winter Wisdom post is about.

THE PROBLEM WITH RESOLUTIONS

Let's be honest: How many New Year's resolutions have you actually kept?

Most people abandon theirs by February. Some by mid-January. A few don't even make it past January 1st.

I used to make the same resolutions every year:

- Lose 20 pounds

- Exercise 5 times a week  

- Be more productive

- Stop procrastinating

And every year, I'd fail. And every year, I'd feel worse about myself.

Then I learned why resolutions don't work.

Resolutions are:

- Externally focused (about DOING, not BEING)

- Based on shame ("I'm not good enough")

- Rigid and binary (you succeed or fail)

- Dependent on willpower (which is limited)

- Made without deep reflection

And here's the thing about perimenopause/menopause:

Your body is already demanding you do things differently. It's asking you to slow down. To honor your cycles. To listen instead of push.

Fighting your biology with willpower-based resolutions? That's a recipe for exhaustion and failure.

There's a better way.

INTENTIONS VS. RESOLUTIONS

Here's the crucial difference:

RESOLUTIONS focus on external achievement:

- "I will lose 20 pounds"

- "I will work out 5 times a week"

- "I will be more productive"

INTENTIONS focus on internal alignment:

- "I will honor my body's wisdom"

- "I will move in ways that feel nourishing"

- "I will align my work with my energy"

See the difference?

Resolutions are about DOING more, better, differently.  

Intentions are about BEING more aligned, aware, authentic.

Resolutions ask: What do I need to FIX about myself?  

Intentions ask: What does my soul need to THRIVE?

For women navigating perimenopause/menopause—when everything is changing, when old approaches don't work anymore, when your body is literally transforming—intentions are the only sustainable path forward.

THE QUESTIONS THAT ACTUALLY MATTER

Traditional year-end reviews ask:

- What did I achieve?

- What goals did I hit?

- What did I fail to accomplish?

These questions focus on external metrics and often leave us feeling inadequate.

Better questions for reflection:

Who did I become this year?

Not what you achieved. Who you BECAME.

Did you become more honest with yourself? More boundaried? More compassionate toward yourself? More aligned with your truth?

This is the real measure of a year.

What transformation occurred (whether I wanted it or not)?

Maybe this year brought unexpected health challenges, relationship endings, career changes, or perimenopause intensifying.

You didn't choose these—but you moved through them.

That's transformation. Honor it.

What did I learn?

From success AND from struggle. From joy AND from pain.

What did you learn about yourself? About what you actually need? About your limits and boundaries? About what truly matters?

Every experience taught you something.

What am I ready to release?

Old stories: "I should be further along by now."  

Old identities: "The version of you that could do it all."  

Old commitments: "Obligations you've outgrown."

What are you carrying that doesn't serve you anymore?

What wants to emerge?

Not what you think SHOULD emerge. What WANTS to.

If you got quiet and listened to your deepest self, what would it say?

A SIMPLE PRACTICE FOR YEAR-END REFLECTION

You don't need hours. You just need intention.

You'll need:

- 30-45 minutes of quiet time

- Your journal

- A candle

- Something warm to drink

- An open heart

The Practice:

1. LIGHT YOUR CANDLE  

Take three deep breaths. Bring yourself fully present.

2. REFLECT ON YOUR YEAR  

Not chronologically. Not by achievement. By feeling.

When did you feel most alive this year?  

When did you feel most yourself?  

What moments stand out—big or small?

3. COMPLETE THESE SENTENCES:

"This year, I became someone who..."

"The hardest thing was..."

"The most beautiful thing was..."

"What I learned about myself is..."

"What I'm most grateful for is..."

"What I'm ready to release is..."

"What I'm carrying forward is..."

"My word for 2025 is..." (Choose ONE word that captures your entire year)

4. HONOR YOUR JOURNEY  

Place your hand on your heart. Take a moment of silence.

You moved through an entire year. You navigated challenges you didn't choose. You showed up for yourself, even when it was hard.

That is everything.

"The only journey is the one within."  

— Rainer Maria Rilke

SETTING INTENTIONS (NOT RESOLUTIONS)

Now that you've reflected, you're ready to set intentions.

Instead of random resolutions, use the 5-Facet Intention Framework—setting intentions across the five dimensions of your being:

✨ SPIRITUAL: How do I want to feel in my connection to something greater?  

💪 PHYSICAL: How do I want to relate to my body?  

🧠 MENTAL: What quality of mind do I want to cultivate?  

💖 EMOTIONAL: How do I want to be with my feelings?  

⚡ ENERGETIC: How do I want to manage my life force energy?

Example spiritual intention:  

"In 2026, I intend to trust my unfolding."

Example physical intention:  

"In 2026, I intend to honor my body's wisdom."

Example mental intention:  

"In 2026, I intend to challenge thoughts that diminish me."

Example emotional intention:  

"In 2026, I intend to feel my feelings without judging them."

Example energetic intention:  

"In 2026, I intend to create boundaries that protect my energy."

From these five facets, what CORE INTENTION emerges?

If you could only have ONE intention that encompasses everything, what would it be?

Examples:

- "I will live aligned with my truth"

- "I will honor all of who I am"

- "I will trust my becoming"

This is your North Star for 2026.

VISION, NOT GOALS

Vision is different from goals.

GOALS = Specific, measurable outcomes  

VISION = The quality of life you want to experience

Instead of: "I will make $100K"  

Vision: "I will feel financially secure and abundant"

Instead of: "I will lose 30 pounds"  

Vision: "I will feel comfortable and at home in my body"

Instead of: "I will get promoted"  

Vision: "I will do work that matters and feels aligned"

Goals can change. Life circumstances shift. But vision guides you regardless.

YOUR 2026 VISION:

"In 2026, I want to FEEL..." (List 3-5 feelings)

"In 2026, I want my life to BE..." (Describe the quality)

"In 2026, I am becoming someone who..." (Complete the sentence)

PRACTICES TO CARRY FORWARD

These aren't resolutions. They're ongoing practices of wisdom:

DAILY:

- Morning check-in with your body (1 min)

- Ask: "What do I need right now?" (ongoing)

WEEKLY:

- Reflect on your core intention (Sunday evening)

- Notice what aligned vs. what depleted (ongoing)

MONTHLY:

- Review your 5-facet intentions (first of month)

- Release what's no longer serving (new moon)

SEASONALLY:

- Honor the natural cycles (equinoxes and solstices)

- Adjust intentions as you grow and change

Remember: This is practice, not perfection.

Some months you'll do all of this. Some months you won't. That's okay.

The practice is always here, waiting for you.

THE GIFT OF REFLECTION

Reflection isn't passive. It's not "doing nothing."

Reflection is:

- How we integrate experience into wisdom

- How we transform challenges into growth

- How we become who we're meant to be

- How we step forward with intention

Without reflection, we keep repeating the same patterns, making the same choices, wondering why nothing changes.

With reflection, we evolve.

YOUR FINAL DAYS OF 2025 INVITATION

This week, I invite you to:

REFLECT with kindness, not criticism  

RELEASE what no longer serves  

ENVISION what wants to emerge  

SET INTENTIONS from your whole self

REMEMBER

You don't need to have it all figured out.  

You don't need to be "better."  

You don't need to fix yourself.

You need to:

- Honor who you've become

- Release what no longer serves

- Trust what wants to emerge

- Step forward with intention

That's enough. That's everything.

"And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been."  

— Rainer Maria Rilke

Welcome to your becoming, dear ones.

The future is not something that happens TO you.  

It's something you CREATE, one intentional choice at a time.

You've got this. 🌟

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JOIN ME IN JANUARY

🎨 Visioning Workshop - January 31st  

Create your radiant 2026 with vision boards, intention-setting, and community support.  

Returning Centering Journey Participant: $45 | Regular: $65

🌙 Radiant Living Circle - Monthly Membership  

Year-round support through perimenopause with the 5-Facet Framework, seasonal wisdom, holistic practices, and community.  

Opening February 1st | Founding member rate: $20/month (through Jan 31)  

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With love and blessings for your new year,  

Jen 🌙✨

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Resources:

Books:

- "Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes" by William Bridges

- "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron

- "The Desire Map" by Danielle LaPorte

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"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."  

— Rumi

Happy New Year, dear ones. May 2026 be your most radiant year yet. 🎆